Jack found choices he never thought possible
By Elwin Hall, AACC member
This story begins with a phone call from Jack’s father saying how worried he was about his son but he didn’t know how to help.
Jack finished Year 12 with a very low tertiary entrance score, started a short TAFE course in horticulture, quickly became bored and decided he might as well work. He moved to an apprentice landscape gardener position and after a couple of months he was unhappy and had no motivation to be there.
Dad organised four career counselling sessions and agreed not to influence what Jack said in our initial meeting.
Jack arrived on time and I discovered a very tall athletic young man. He was not comfortable, and was struggling to make eye contact with me. While small talk and conversation didn’t come easily, he was polite and answered my questions.
He came across as not afraid of hard work and competitive in the sporting arena. Jack had played 150 games of footy, was team captain and was well respected by his players. His current thinking was to join the police force.
As I stood up to conclude, handing him his ’homework’ he said, “What am I going to tell my boss on Tuesday about my apprenticeship? There’s an amnesty until Tuesday if I want to leave; four others have already left”.
Over the next 35 minutes we established that it would be stupid to prolong the inevitable; he would give notice the next day. Jack sat 5cm taller in the chair.
’Tell parents tonight’ was added to his list of ’homework’.
As Jack became more comfortable with me, he told me how he had enjoyed primary school and had thought about becoming a teacher. Secondary college was “too tough academically even though I always did my homework”. After year 10 Jack chose TAFE because “a footy component was offered within the curriculum”. Academic expectations at TAFE were lower than his previous school and he spent most of his time doing weights and training.
Jack made several statements:
- “I’m a good football captain on the ground. I’m serious at training but like mucking around I guess.”
- “People don’t value what I say.”
Needing to unpick these two points I obtained permission from him to speak with his Dad and his oldest brother, Mark. It was important for his Dad to know that it was time to step back but that his help might be needed again later.
A ‘homework’ task had sought feedback from others about a ‘perfect job’ fit and Mark came up with:
- ‘Elite/challenging level e.g. military / police’
- ‘The top level – the goal is to see the way through, the steps in between is what’s required.’
These seemed to reinforce my ideas about Jack’s undervalued skills and special leadership abilities. I decided to phone Mark. I learned he was 12 years older than Jack. He had recently returned from overseas where he’d been in charge of many people in dangerous situations. And Mark confirmed my hunch about Jack. Jack’s natural gifts were different from others around him; they were unique and important in many situations and had probably not been valued within the school system.
Giving Jack this information allowed him to understand that he was OK as a person, and together we began mapping his career path with a goal of joining the police force. His map showed actions to take that included further TAFE study in Outdoor Education.
Two and a half years later a very confident young man appeared at my door saying he’d been accepted into university and was going to study to be a primary school teacher.
By mapping his path and thinking about his options, Jack found choices he never thought would be possible.
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“Everybody's good at something. Find it.” says Pink.
Take Pink’s advice and have a go at mapping your career-life path. Never give up. Ask for help if you get stuck.
P.S. Pink also says “Stupid is selling yourself short.” Don’t let this happen to you!